First, let it be understood, the vow of celibacy is not something I advocate. Never once have I ever suggested it to anyone. Celibacy is a calling, an invitation, and yes, a difficult sacrifice not for everyone.
I write this only as an explanation. By sharing my own personal experience, perhaps I can bring some clarity to a controversial and misunderstood subject. Be warned, however, I am no Thomas Merton. Don't expect ecclesiastic rhetoric about sins of the flesh, self denial, and virgin martyrs. I may be a monk, but I am a monk from the Bronx and my people are known for their colorful language (which I will try to tone down).
Amid all the wreckage, one wall still stood ready to be demolished, not brick by brick, but with a gut-wrenching explosion. It was time to answer that question not with just a yes or no. I would have to answer it with my life.