Tuesday, December 30, 2014


Some things can never be fixed.

Forgiveness does not mean foolishness.

For me, it's never a question of forgiving. I never take negative actions towards me as something personal but rather a demonstration of another person's confusion, fear and well, insanity.

However, words cannot undo the damage caused by someone's actions and there are consequences to all we do. For every action there is a reaction. Some actions attract. Other actions repel.

Know that I walk away, not because I don't forgive you. I walk away because I won't be fooled again.

Saturday, December 27, 2014


As the New Year is near, I think of the journey ahead and what changes it will bring.

I wonder what to do with this Blog, if anything. I'm sure not many, if anyone reads it and so, what value is there in continuing. 

I don't write about my life all that much because it is, after all, my life and who could possibly be interested in an old man just stumbling through life. Also, it is my life and what happens on my journey is specific to me and the growth of my soul.

Perhaps, if I wrote more about how I deal with the daily challenges of life.

But at this moment, I am tired and have a bit of a cold. I should rest and pray. I know much lies ahead. No doubt a change of address. Maybe more brothers joining the community. It's also been suggested I take legal action against a family member, but I'm not feeling vengeful (well, not now anyway LOL).

What I do pray for in the coming year, is a return to simplicity so I can concentrate on my own spiritual growth and my relationship with Him.

May it be so.

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Christmas Eve

No matter what you believe, one thing cannot be denied.

A child was born and changed the course of history.

Wishing all friends and true family


Monday, December 22, 2014

keeping Christmas

It's been difficult to find again the joy I once had this time of year. There are moments, like when I set up the nativity set or like last night when Derrick and I stood in front of the house looking at the luminarias lining the curb along the street. (luminarias are made from brown paper bags weighted down with sand and illuminated from within by a lit candle. These are typically arranged in rows to create large and elaborate displays. The hope among Roman Catholics is that the lights will guide the spirit of the Christ child to one's home.)
But it's been a tough year of unexpected events.

I know nothing will give me that feeling. It is something I have to find for myself. So, I will hold on to that peace in my heart and keep my mind of the birth of Christ.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

The day of all days

In the mystery of his becoming man, Christ showed us what humanity was meant to become. He showed us the transcendent dignity and destiny of each human person as a child of God.

-- Archbishop Jose Gomez

And so each Christmas we prepare for the Holy Day by opening our hearts not just for the birth of Christ but for our own re-birth. I suppose in a way, it's a spiritual New Year's Day, that is "Out with the old and in with the new."

Yet, the world does the opposite - accumulating gifts, hurrying about with shopping, traveling, cooking and decorating a tree so that it no longer looks like a tree. 

I will have a quiet Christmas along with my brothers, letting it be a time of peace and reflection. The only gift I want is for Christ to enter my heart.

Monday, December 15, 2014

Three X 3

As much as I prefer to be a hermit, the experiences of meditating with others, my two companions of this humble community, has been extraordinary. 

Each night we spend about an hour together in prayer and meditation. Some of the time is spent doing simple Qi Gong exercises. Then we move onto inner contemplation, each of us concentrating on our own spiritual development. We end by turning our attention outward - into the world or towards a specific person.

Tonight we prayed for someone who was feeling lonely and afraid. I can't be sure what the result will be but when a soul comes to our attention (in this case, the mother of someone in the community) we have to do whatever we can, acting with both wisdom and compassion.

We started by joining our own energy and intentions with each other, visualizing a tall white candle in front of each person.

As each of us stared into the light, we "saw" the same light surrounding the person we were praying for.

We didn't pray for anything to change, didn't want to make everything alright. Instead we opened our hearts to give comfort and strength. Most of all to give her a sense that she wasn't alone.

Wisdom is needed when praying for someone. In the past we had prayed for other people in our family only to result in a negative reaction. Prayer is not a cure all. It is an energy. Not all people are open to receiving. Some will always prefer the darkness. We must accept that. Nevertheless, we keep the candle burning bright in our hearts.

How much brighter is that light when united with the light of others.

Mother Mary

“Let us run to Mary, and, as her little children, cast ourselves into her arms with a perfect confidence.”
~Saint Francis de Sales

By honoring Mother Mary we honor all women in this world who embody the spiritual abilities to heal, to comfort, to have strength in times of adversity, to sacrifice for a greater good. We honor all people, men, as well as women, who see all people as their children.

“Mary is the most sweet bait, chosen, prepared, and ordained by God, to catch the hearts of men.” 

~Saint Catherine of Siena

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Christian Taoism: Open Ears

Christian Taoism: Open Ears

It is possible

A brother said to Abba Anthony, "Pray for me." The old man said to him, "I will have no mercy upon you, nor will God have any, if you yourself do not make an effort and if you do not pray to God."

It is by our own efforts we fly to God. Nothing or no one can take you there. Others may guide but you must spread your wings. The winds will help you soar but it is up to you to find the air currents to carry you higher.

Clinging to anyone or anything, a book, a statue, a ritual is to be dependent on external and therefore temporary spiritual aids, which will keep you weak and dependent. In the end, you are left alone with only yourself.

Believe in yourself and make the effort.